Rejoice in my insufficiency?

I had trouble going to sleep last night as I was thinking about work.  I’m sure you’ve never been there, but try to imagine it.  HA!  I’m a part of a team that will help our hospital change to a new electronic health record system tomorrow.  The change is very positive, the entire hospital will be on the same system, increasing the speed of information getting to all the places it needs to get while also increasing safety and privacy for our patients.  It’s all good.  But…there’s always a big but, right?…now tomorrow is the day we change and my nerves are a bit jumpy.  We have trained all the staff, had meetings about meetings regarding meetings, and tried to prepare in every way we can fathom, but there are still questions.  The reality is, you don’t know what you don’t know.    So, let’s “go-live” and see how it goes!  That’s the plan…

Jesus Calling My personal preparation for today, as far as the computer part, has been a journey over the past 3 months.  But as is true for every experience, my growth in my personal life as well as my professional life join together in harmony to give me a foundation to move forward in spite of nerves or concerns.  My source of strength and security is the Lord. This morning I woke up and got my yogurt and fruit ready and a nice tall glass of water.  Healthy lives are the balance of all areas, physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual, and I have learned the value of remaining consistent in self-care through whatever each day may bring.  Today my devotions began with a book that I love called Jesus Calling by Sarah Young.  As I quieted my busy mind and tried to focus the words of encouragement I hoped to see were not quite what I expected.  “When some basic need is lacking – time, energy, money – consider yourself blessed….When you begin a day with inadequate resources, you must concentrate your efforts on the present moment.  This is where you are meant to live–in the present; it is the place where I always await you….Rejoice in your insufficiency, knowing that my power is made perfect in weakness.”  Well, it wasn’t the victory song or pep talk I was hoping for!

As I let it sink in during my workout, I began to listen to the Holy Spirit instead of the voice in my head (which was telling me that I was not going to meet the standards my co-workers/peers/managers had set for me) and the peace came.  This process is not about me.  It isn’t about what I know, what I can teach, how I can lead, or how I can rescue anybody….it is about surrender and keeping my focus on helping others.  When my focus slips to myself, it is a quick trip into nowhere good!  When my focus in on the Lord, I am a pathway for his love and wisdom to be a resource to those around me.  That is what we need today!  Ok, I get it now.

The beauty here is the pressure is relieved.  Yes, I have had training and spent time with the system.  Yes, I know some helpful things.  No, I do not know everything, nor am I an expert on the workflow issues that involve many departments, doctors, policies, and managers.  BUT  (here it is, the big but) I can show up with a helpful spirit, and a mind focused on being a servant instead of making sure I look good in front of everyone, and God can take it from there!  Thank you Lord for your truth that pierces the darkness and brings peace.  Thank you Father for your love that is big enough to be patient with us.

Let’s do this!

 

“Have I not commanded you?  Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged,

for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”  Joshua 1:9

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3 Responses

  1. Beautifully written,sweetie. God goes before you, clearly!

  2. Thx for a great posting!

  3. Way to go girl! A rocking blog! Keep it up girl and hope Day ONE going live went well…or goes well if it is today. Keep me posted! You are prepared and have all (and more) than you need, in Him!

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Surviving life with grace and hope

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